This is a world of magic that I've been living and breathing for years, that is as much a part of my life as my 'real' life - a world where I've found wonderful friends and family complete with unique personalities, and romance, and adventure.
In short, I know the story like the back of my hand.
Why then am I not putting my all into it?
I used to think that I was afraid of depleting my store of ideas. If I put everything into this story, what would I have left for the next? Wouldn't my creative output be exhausted? Wouldn't my descriptions be forced to endlessly repeat themselves for lack of alternatives?
But I've long realised that the imagination is pretty unlimited, so it's not really my running out of ideas that I'm afraid of.
This week, reaching the end of some chapters in my real life has given me a clue as to why I haven't been able to complete the chapters in my book. It's a simple enough reason: I don't want to let go.
I really don't want to let go.
I want this world of magic that I've created to remain mine for just a moment longer. It's become a huge part of who I am, the person I've grown to become, and it feels strange to think that it's time to set this story free and move on to another project. I'm not sure I'm ready to move on just yet.
I wonder how many writers face this strange internal conflict: writing to share your stories while being reluctant to let your 'babies' out into the world when they're old enough to fulfil their purpose? I'm betting there are a lot of us out there...
But I think success can never come without the courage to take risks, move on, and let go. So... it's gonna be a race to the finish line, and I might take just a little while longer than I should, but I believe Isabella Amaris will be releasing her first full-length fantasy in the beginning of 2012:) Website, excerpts from the book and - oh yes, the title! -should be out very soon.
Just wish me luck in getting everything together in time. A mad dash like mine can use all the luck it can get!:)